What karma is active in your life?

You can change your job, your city, your partner, your hairstyle, even your country, and some time later discover that you are once again taking part in a suspiciously familiar story. The action takes place somewhere else, the characters are new, the circumstances look different, and the feeling is exactly the same. Once again we wait for someone to choose us, we try to earn love, we are afraid to say what we think, or we take responsibility for problems that actually belong to other people. And the most curious part is that we usually recognise the repetition only when we are already deep enough in it to find it hard to step out. As if life had offered us a new story, and somewhere in the middle we realise we have read this book before. More than once, in fact.

For a long time I have been asking myself why certain experiences return to our lives. Why does one love story end, the next one begin with great hopes, and in the end the same question torments us again? Why does a person who has spent a lifetime trying to be good to everyone so often end up surrounded by people who expect more and more? And why do some opportunities draw us with enormous force, and yet, exactly when we have to take the decisive step, we find ten convincing reasons to give up?

In spiritual traditions such repetitions are often linked to karma, while psychology looks at them through our beliefs, emotional experiences, family patterns and ways of attachment. Personally, I am interested in what both approaches can help us understand about ourselves. Because whether we believe in past lives or look for the causes in this one, one very real question remains: why, out of all possible stories, do we so often choose exactly the one that has already hurt us?

Karmic debt, karmic lesson, or a story that has not ended yet?

The word “karma” comes from Sanskrit and is originally connected with action. In Indian philosophical and religious traditions it covers the complex relationship between intentions, deeds and their consequences. Over time the concept gained many meanings, especially in Western esotericism, where we began to speak of karmic partners, karmic debt, ancestral karma, past lives and lessons the soul has to learn.

I do not see karma as some heavenly accountant leafing through a thick ledger and calculating how much more suffering we are owed for the mistakes of previous lives. If such a law exists, it is hardly that simple. What interests me more is the possibility that certain experiences meet us again with questions we have not yet answered. And what interests me even more is what we do once we recognise them.

Imagine a woman who for years has ended up in relationships with men who find it hard to express their feelings. The first was busy with his career, the second still did not know what he wanted from life, and the third was a wonderful person who simply needed a little more time. After every breakup she promises herself that the next one will be different, and yet she again finds herself in a relationship where she waits, hopes, analyses every word and rejoices at small gestures as if she had won the big prize. In an esoteric sense we could call this a karmic lesson about love and self-worth. From a psychological point of view we would look for the cause in her experience, her attachments and her ideas about closeness. In both cases, though, it is worth asking why she so easily accepts love as something she has to keep earning.

These are exactly the questions we can explore in the Karma room in FatedWays, where a symbolic look at personal stories helps us search for the possible connections between the past, the present and the choices we make.

Love karma — why do some people feel so familiar?

Probably most of the questions I receive about karma are about love. Someone meets a person and after the very first conversation feels as if they have known each other for years. The attraction is strong, the conversations last for hours, and closeness appears so quickly that the two begin to talk about a fated meeting. After some time, however, it turns out that one wants more closeness, the other pulls away, and then come doubts, jealousy, expectations and those endless attempts to work out what the last message, sent at eleven at night, really means.

In esoteric ideas such relationships are often called karmic connections. According to some spiritual teachings, souls can meet in different incarnations to continue an unfinished story, to keep a promise or to live through a certain lesson. This is a matter of spiritual belief, and yet the experience of strong attachment is completely real for the person who feels it.

That is exactly why it seems important to me to tell strong attraction apart from the quality of a relationship. We can feel incredible closeness with someone and still find ourselves in a relationship that wears us out. We can think of a person from morning till night, dream of them, see signs everywhere, and still not receive from them what we really need. The feeling of destiny on its own does not tell us whether two people can build a happy relationship.

And the idea of a karmic partner sometimes turns into a very convenient excuse. If the relationship is karmic, then we must wait, forgive endlessly, endure every trial and hope that one day the other will understand how much we love them. Love, however, asks for the participation of both people, however many past lives we imagine we have shared.

The most interesting moment comes when we recognise the familiar script and discover that we already react differently. A person we would once have waited for for years may still attract us today, and yet fail to convince us to set aside our own wishes. Then perhaps the lesson has already borne fruit, whatever we choose to call it.

In the Compatibility room in FatedWays you can look at the astrological interactions between you and a particular person, explore the strengths of the relationship and the differences that may become a test for it.

Ancestral karma — when we live by rules we never chose

One of the most interesting subjects for me is ancestral karma, because family stories have a remarkable ability to live on through the next generations. Every family has beliefs that are passed down so naturally that nobody stops to ask whether they are true. Money is earned with hard work, you should not trust people, a good woman has to put up with things, the men in our family do not show their feelings, and it is proper to think of yourself only after you have taken care of everyone else.

Such rules can be spoken quite openly, yet we often absorb them simply by watching the adults around us. A child who grows up surrounded by constant worries about money may keep the fear of poverty even when, as an adult, they have good financial security. A girl who has watched her mother take on all the responsibility for the family may start doing the same in her own relationships, without ever wondering why it is so hard for her to accept help.

In spiritual teachings these repetitions can be seen as ancestral karmic patterns, while in psychology we speak of the influence of the family environment, learned beliefs and behaviour passed down through generations. What matters is that a person can begin to recognise them and decide what of their inheritance they wish to keep.

Especially curious are the stories in which several generations live through similar relationships. A grandmother, a mother and a daughter may have completely different characters, and yet each of them ends up in a relationship where her own needs come last. Whether we call this ancestral karma, a family pattern or simple coincidence depends on how we look at life. But if the daughter manages to make a different choice, the story already has the chance to continue in a new way.

This is exactly what the Lineage room in FatedWays is dedicated to. There you can look at inherited stories, family influences and the invisible ties that still matter for your decisions.

Money karma — why some people earn well and watch it slip away, while others are afraid to ask for more

When we talk about karma, love usually takes all the attention, and yet money can also tell us some rather interesting stories. One person works tirelessly, earns well and still lives with the constant feeling that tomorrow everything may disappear. Another has good ideas, abilities and opportunities, and always finds a reason to postpone the next step. A third helps everyone around them financially while their own needs wait for better times.

In esotericism such themes are often linked to the karma of abundance, karmic debt, the fear of loss and beliefs about one’s own worth. Of course, a real financial situation depends on many economic and life circumstances that karma cannot explain. Our relationship with money, however, is a separate story and is often worth looking at.

It is interesting, for example, why some people feel guilty when they spend on themselves, yet readily give money to others. Or why a person who dreams of starting their own business can spend years preparing for the perfect moment, which never arrives. Fear of failure, family beliefs and past disappointments can influence our decisions far more strongly than we think.

In the Money room in FatedWays you can explore symbolically your relationship with material security, opportunities and the choices you make.

The karma of silence — what do unspoken words cost?

One of the themes that often goes unnoticed is silence. Remember how many times you wanted to say something important and gave up because the moment was wrong, the other person might be offended, or you were afraid of the consequences. And how often the conversation then went on in your thoughts, sometimes for years, as you silently said everything you should have said at the time.

Silence can become a habit, especially when we are used to avoiding conflict or putting other people’s feelings before our own. Then we begin to accept situations that leave us unsatisfied, and we wait for the other person to guess what is troubling us. Unfortunately, the ability to read minds is still not widespread, although quite a few people expect their partners to have it.

In a symbolic karmic reading this theme can be linked to a suppressed voice, the fear of rejection and the need to learn to express our own needs. The first change can begin with one perfectly ordinary conversation that we have been putting off until now.

If you want to look at such a situation from different angles, the Scene room in FatedWays offers a way to explore symbolically the relationships and the roles we play in them.

The karma of loss and parting — why does the past keep pulling us back?

A breakup can be over in a few minutes, while living through it can last much longer. The person has left, the relationship has ended, everyday life has gradually changed, and we keep thinking about what we could have said, done or understood earlier. Years may have passed, we may have built a new life and even be happy with another partner, and then a certain memory, a song or a chance meeting suddenly wakes the same feelings.

It is especially hard when the story was left without a clear ending. Someone left without an explanation, a promise remained unkept, or the conversation that should have brought clarity simply never happened. Then we may keep looking for answers from a person who has long since stopped being part of our life.

In esoteric ideas such relationships can be seen as unfinished karmic connections. Whatever explanation we choose, the great challenge is to understand what we actually keep expecting from the past. The person’s return, an admission, an apology, or proof that what we lived through mattered?

In the Letting Go room in FatedWays you can continue with this theme through personal questions and practices aimed at making sense of emotional attachments and unfinished stories.

Can karma be changed?

This is probably the question that most deserves our attention. If we accept that certain experiences come back to teach us something, does it mean we have to live through them again and again until we finally pass some invisible exam? And who actually checks the results?

Different spiritual traditions see liberation from karma in different ways. In some of them intentions and actions matter most, in others awareness, compassion and freedom from attachment. In more modern esoteric ideas people often speak of breaking karmic patterns and releasing old promises or bonds.

I find it far more useful to start with our own behaviour. If every time we are afraid of being abandoned we start chasing the other person, we can try to understand what triggers that reaction. If we keep agreeing to things we do not want, we can learn to express our boundaries. If we postpone important decisions, we can look for the reason instead of waiting for life to choose for us.

This certainly does not mean that everything depends on our personal will. Circumstances, other people’s behaviour and events beyond our control still matter. But when we recognise our own part in a particular pattern, we gain the chance to change at least part of it.

One of the complementary approaches to working with emotional tension is EFT, known as the Emotional Freedom Technique, or tapping. Attention is directed to a specific experience while certain points on the body are tapped. This practice is not a proven way to remove karma and does not replace professional help with serious emotional difficulties, yet some people use it as a means of self-observation and of easing tension.

In FatedWays you can try it in the Tapping room by choosing the theme you want to work on.

What karma is active in your life right now?

After all these reflections you have probably started to wonder whether there is a story in your own life that repeats itself suspiciously often. Perhaps it is connected with love, family, money or some old decision that still shapes the present. Or perhaps the most important theme is quite different from the one you expect.

That is exactly why I decided to create a new game in FatedWays that combines an intuitive choice of words with the symbols of the Tarot. I called it “What karma is active in your life?”, because I want us to look at karma through the concrete human stories that keep occupying us.

In front of you is a grid of letters with different words hidden in it. Some of them are connected with love, family, fear, forgiveness and the past, others with choice, freedom, personal boundaries and the possibility of change. Your task is to find the first three words that catch your eye. Do not try to analyse their meaning in advance or look for the ones that best fit your own story. I am interested in your immediate choice, before the mind has started preparing explanations.

Then you will choose three numbers from 1 to 78, which we will connect with the Tarot. The first will point to the theme that may be especially important in your present life, the second will help us see what feeds it or brings it back again, and the third will give us a symbolic starting point for your possible next choice.

Combining the words and the cards will let us look at your story from several different sides. Of course, a game like this cannot prove that karma exists or determine your future in advance. But it can lead you to a question you have not paid enough attention to so far, and that in itself is an interesting beginning.

What comes next, once you find your karmic key?

For me it has always mattered that a reading leaves behind more than a curious impression. When a person recognises a certain theme in their life, the wish to explore it more deeply arises naturally. And that is exactly why I created FatedWays as a world of different rooms, where one question can lead us to the next.

If your message is about love, you can continue to Compatibility and look at your relationship with a particular person. If you discover a family theme, the Lineage room will offer you a different perspective on inherited patterns. If your choice points to old attachments, you can go on to Letting Go, and if you want to look at a situation through the roles of the people in it, The Scene can give you an interesting way to do so. The Karma room is the natural next step for those who want to go deeper into the symbolism of karmic connections and recurring life themes.

In this way a game can become the beginning of a much more personal exploration. And perhaps the best part is that nobody can predict in advance which question they will reach once they start looking at their own story.

I often think how curious it would be if we could go back to a certain moment of our life and see all the possible continuations of what we decided then. What would have happened if we had stayed? If we had left earlier? If we had admitted our feelings or refused yet another compromise? Of course, we will never get an answer to all these questions, yet the present offers us something just as interesting — the chance to make the next choice.

If life once again brings you a familiar story, notice what draws you to it, what you hope to receive and whether you still want the same thing. It may turn out that the most important change has already begun, because this time you recognised the story long before you reached its last page.